Other-Smothered

My mom always likes to recount how industrious I was as a child. She says my first "business venture" involved me picking flowers out of the neighbors yard and then knocking on their doors to sell those same flowers back to them. At the time, it seemed like a good idea.

When I was 19 and wanted to add some income to supplement my minimum-wage-paying job, I purchased a 100 piece lot of jewelry  from a friend of mine and resold it at a 300% markup. It worked! I started successfully selling jewelry pieces to friends and family, at local hair shows, flea markets, city fairs and even had a Peddler's License. I could smell a sale from a mile away. I was, by all accounts, winning!

Eventually I opened a street corner store front. No really!! I was on a street corner with literally all of my inventory sprawled out on one of those 8x8 fold up tables you get from Walmart.  I even hired a security guard to stand watch during my street corner transactions. One night some friends spotted me and pulled over. "Giirrrl, why you out here hustlin' and stuff?" they asked. "You get kicked out?" "Girl, you need a ride?"

Here I was with a vision, a fully executed plan, a license, and $600 in so-called "hustle" money. So what did I do? I packed up the remainder of my inventory, paid my security guard, packed my trunk and drove off crying my eyes out. I was humiliated that my peers would think about me this way. None of what they'd said was true and yet it brought my vision crashing down and I let it completely transform my plan, my business.

Now I look back and realize that I still occasionally fall victim to other-smothering. There are still times when my fear of public reaction and disdain get the better of my logic. I've been sidetracked more than once by a hyper-consciousness of other's reactions to my unconventional approach. But I've learned that it takes a type of bold obliviousness to others reactions and with the best of intentions our peers can often project their own fears on to us. My advice is to flee from all signs of dream-tampering and pursue your visions boldly and diligently.